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Speaker 1
So, hi. Welcome to another episode of Tina Arena.

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Speaker 1
Today I am joined by my friend and inventor, Yvonne.

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Speaker 2
Hello.

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Speaker 1
I've actually known, and I was thinking about this on the car right here, like, 23 years ish.

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Speaker 3
Since grade school, basically.

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Speaker 1
crazy. So I've seen Annie go through a really big journey with, like, your health and fitness, and I thought it would be really cool for us to go through that a little bit, and you can talk about it. So, what was like growing up, food and your relationship to food?

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Speaker 3
I feel like with most Asian parents, like, we have to eat all of our food on our plate or else we can't leave the table. And so I struggle with that a lot because I would feel full eating, but then my mom would be like, you have to finish all of it. And I remember that I would like just shove all the food in my mouth, hold it in my mouth and say, I'm done.

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Speaker 3
And I would go spit it out in my closet. I don't know why I would do that in my closet like a weirdo, but like, I remember spitting it out my closet because I was so scared that she would like to find out.

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Speaker 2
Yeah.

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Speaker 3
So I think, like, my relationship with food is like, has it was never really, like, good. and then after I kind of once I had my own money and I could eat whatever I wanted, I kind of that's when like, my, like, bingeing kind of happened, like my overeating and just, like, having no, like, indicator of when I'm full anymore.

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Speaker 1
Were you already a vegan at that point?

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Speaker 3
No. So I was vegan after I had my two kids, and then that was when I started getting, like, healthy again. But then I feel like being a vegan is just kind of. I don't want to like, upset anyone. But like for me, it was kind of just another way of like having some sort of eating disorder, just like a restriction on you.

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Speaker 3
it caused structure for my eating. But at the same time, I wasn't eating that great after a while.

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Speaker 1
Yeah.

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Speaker 3
So it was like, I feel like it wasn't it didn't work out for me. And then so after like eight years, I kind of just went back to how I normally.

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Speaker 1
And that was weird because you I think you did that quietly on your own for a while. What were your thoughts when you were thinking about maybe ending veganism? Because I know what scares a lot of

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Speaker 3
Yeah,

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Speaker 3
I was nervous so my hair was like thinning a lot at the top. And I was like this is not like healthy for me because I'm now I was just a junk food vegan. Like in the beginning, I was very healthy. No oil, no sugar, very restrictive. But then after I was like, I had one taste of like the Skittles again, and I was like, oh my God.

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Speaker 3
And then it kind of just spiraled from there.

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Speaker 1
Wait, Skittles aren't vegan.

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Speaker 3
They are vegan.

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Speaker 3
They are. And so I didn't have any like, sugar before.

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Speaker 3
And then I started eating like Oreos and like the vegan junk food stuff. And then that's when I kind of spiraled. but then when I decided to go back into eating meat again, I started with just like seafood and I like I felt guilty.

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Speaker 3
I was almost, like, embarrassed. So, I was scared to eat the food here at the store. Like, if I had my lunch, like, I'd be scared to, like, eat out in public. And then after I was like, it doesn't matter. This is like my journey. So I'm like, I'm just going to embrace it. And then I just, like, fully went back.

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Speaker 3
Yeah.

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Speaker 1
Well, you do kind of like your starts did start off as a vegan store, right? So did you receive any hate or flack

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Speaker 3
No, I don't think so, because we never came out and said that we are a vegan store. It's just because I was a vegan at the time. Everything just was vegan. and now we kind of have like, we do have a little bit of like dairy in here, but not we won't have, like, actual dairy milk, just plant based still.

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Speaker 3
and we won't have, like, any meats or anything, but, yeah, luckily we didn't brand yourself as, like, a vegan store, so that was okay.

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Speaker 1
So, like, going through this whole journey, what has been your mindset like, like the obviously you started off with a pretty unhealthy relationship to food, and it led to you wanting to restrict and then becoming vegan. And then that was binging. And then after that, I'm not sure. so how is your relationship with food progressed through all of this?

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Speaker 3
now it's been it's much better like I before I was like, I can't if I'm going to be healthy, I'm not going to have any like junk food, any like cakes, any candies. But now it's more about portion control than restricting what I'm eating. So I just decided that I'm going to eat whatever I want, but then I'm going to keep it to a minimum and not like try to binge so much.

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Speaker 3
So like when I was in my relationship, it was like kind of enabling because we would go and get like huge, like platters of food and just eat at us too. And like, it was just a ridiculous amount of food. It would feed like six people at least, and we would sit there and eat and eat meat and like, now I'm just like, if I were to do that, I would just feel like so sick.

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Speaker 3
I've kind of found my, what's the word like, my intuitive eating again. So when I'm, when I'm full, I'm like, okay, that's it. And I'm able to like, stop now.

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Speaker 1
for a lot of people that's where the struggle is right. Like going back to the intuitive eating and then like finding your hunger signals. Because I know for me when I was binging

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Speaker 1
I didn't know what fall felt like. And I didn't understand when to stop eating.

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Speaker 1
I always wanted food. So how did you learn that kind of stuff?

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Speaker 3
I think I kind of just started to eat slower, too. So then once I feel like I'm, like going to, like throw up the food, that's what I'm like. That's. It's too much now, so I, I stop I don't know, like there wasn't like an actual, like a process that I go through to like get to there.

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Speaker 3
It's just now I'm just practicing a little bit more of like, it's still hard, like sometimes, like yesterday I had, like, a slice of, like, red velvet cake. And normally it was a big slice. And normally I would eat that whole thing, even if I was like two for I was like, well, I have to finish it. But now I'm like, okay.

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Speaker 3
Like I had like half of it. I'm like, I'm good, I'm good, and I just stop. So it's more of like, it's more my mindset than really listening to my body right now. Yeah. and that's like, I think that's the tough part for sure, because some days I'm just like, especially when I'm emotional or like PMS thing or something.

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Speaker 3
I just want to like, binge again and just like find comfort in that. So that's really hard to like overcome that. Like mentally. so it's never it's always a challenge. Always I think forever it will be.

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Speaker 1
I was actually thinking about this too, because yesterday I ate a piece of birthday cake because it was just my brother's birthday, and it wasn't even a big piece. It was actually a tiny piece, but it was a high in sugar. So I got that instant sugar rush. And for me, that's like a trigger for my binge behavior.

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Speaker 1
When I feel that sugar rush and I'm like, I should just binge now because, like, I already did it. Like I feel it. So it I didn't binge. I did eat a little bit extra, but like, I didn't go full out binge and I was just like, this is just a constant practice all of the time. Even though I've been working on this for so long, like those triggers are still there and we're still working on it all of the time.

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Speaker 3
I've, I've still had moments where I'm like overeating sitting there with like a bag of chips and then sometimes it hits me. I'm like, I feel like I'm going to throw up because I've eaten so much. And then I'm like, that's those are moments where I'm like, what the hell am I doing? So it's it's always going to be like that.

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Speaker 3
I think it's just some days are harder than others.

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Speaker 1
Yeah.

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Speaker 1
So I'm hearing you say that it's been a practice for the most part. And slowing down. Yeah. Is there anything else that comes to mind? Like if someone were to ask you now, what are the things that you focus on? What would you tell them?

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Speaker 2
for me, I don't focus on healthy eating. I just eat what I want, but make sure that my portions are reasonable. And I think that's what's helped me a lot. Because if you're trying, if you're already coming from, like, restrictive eating and then you're like, I have to like, eat healthy. All the vegetables, all this. No, this.

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Speaker 2
It's not going to be sustainable. So for me, this is the most sustainable way is just like, eat whatever you want. Make sure that you're exercising and then just keep your portions to, like, something reasonable.

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Speaker 1
Yeah, yeah. And that's exactly what I tell everyone too. You can't feel like you're restricting entire food groups or like, desserts or just sugar in general, because that's what makes us rebel and then want to binge even more when you. Because it's like when you eat something that you tell yourself you can't have, then you're automatically a bad person.

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Speaker 1
And if you're a bad person, then you might as well just go all out and be a terrible person.

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Speaker 2
That makes, that makes a lot of sense because then you, you are setting yourself up for that guilt. So then if you have that piece of chocolate that you're telling yourself not to, then you feel like you're a shitty person. Yeah. So that makes a lot of sense.

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Speaker 1
Yeah. And then to me, all of the people that I look up to that have healthy relationships with food, they don't restrict like that. They are eating the cake. They're, you know, having fun at the birthday parties whenever they're there, like they're just living life. And that's the kind of life that I'm trying to. Yeah, built for.

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Speaker 2
Me. So

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Speaker 2
It's it's always going to be like something that you have to work towards for sure. And I think exercising is a huge part for me too, in order to keep that lifestyle.

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Speaker 1
Yeah.

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Speaker 2
Keep like that mindset I guess is like, I know that I'm exercising. So I'm like, I'm still staying healthy and like. Yeah.

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Speaker 1
Did you were you consistent with your exercise like throughout your life?

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Speaker 2
No. So I was up and down. Up and down for sure. Like there's times where I'd be, like, all in, like, working out every day, and then I'd like, binge. And then I would just go back. And then this is the first time in my life ever that it stayed consistent. And I've actually enjoyed it.

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Speaker 2
And I think because of that mindset, like before, I was like, I have to be super clean and everything. And then now it's like, no, I'm just a regular person. I'm going to like workout like just do regular things, eat regular food and not just like be so hard on myself. Yeah. So yeah this is the first time it's been like sticking.

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Speaker 2
up awesome.

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Speaker 1
And then, so are you sticking to, plan or what's your workout schedule or what are your workouts that you kind of do now?

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Speaker 2
so I started off with Pilates. That was basically what, like, triggered everything in, like, a good way. because after having kids, like, my pelvic floor was all, like, loose and ruined and stuff, and then Pilates basically healed that I was like, oh, this is like, this is crazy. That like, exercise and can do that. And I think that was where the shift happened for me because I was like before was like exercising to lose weight.

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Speaker 2
Now it's like, I understand how the body works and I'm trying to heal it through exercising. And that's what drives me to like, keep going. So I started off with Pilates and then now I'm, I'm starting with like weight lift training and stuff. and now I'm adding like, running and cardio and stuff in, so I just do like 4 or 5 times a week or like, and then some days I'm like too tired and like I don't work out.

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Speaker 2
So it's just whatever I feel like basically.

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Speaker 1
I love that. Yeah, yeah. The pelvic floor stuff really scares me that people don't talk about that enough.

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Speaker 2
It's a real thing. Like just doing jumping jacks before I would, like, pee my pants. Laughing. I pee my pants. Like, running from the car to the house to go to the bathroom. I wouldn't make it. And I was like, this is horrible. And then after a couple weeks of, like, plotting, I was like, I don't have that problem anymore.

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Speaker 2
And it was just, yeah, it was like a light bulb moment. I was like, this is insane. That like, exercising. This is it's what it's doing, its job. So yeah, that's why I like connected with them and that's why I stuck with them like this. It's healing.

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Speaker 1
Really.

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Speaker 1
I mean, that's so cool that Pilates has the power to do all of

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Speaker 2
Yeah, it actually started off, I was like, rehabilitation exercises for the body. So it's all about, like, lengthening the spine and, like, alignment of the body. And, just rehab for it. So it's not about, like, necessarily losing weight. Yeah. And I think that was like a key thing for me. Yeah.

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Speaker 1
And then I'm also hearing another thing is that you just started off with just Pilates. Right. And it was probably just a couple times a week. You started with Pilates.

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Speaker 2
So actually to start, started off with like I use this app free, which is like kind of like CrossFit training. And that's what I did when I was vegan. So that's what I like reverted back to when I was trying to get healthy again. And it wasn't like the same, like I was being very lazy about it and like I wasn't connecting with it.

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Speaker 2
And then that's when I found places and then I did it. Yeah, like four, 4 or 5 times a week. And then I just saw like changes in my body. And I was like, this is so cool. And then I became a teacher. And then like all of this though, it's yeah, it's been awesome,

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Speaker 1
I mean I haven't I'm in yoga teacher training so I haven't actually taught any classes yet. But I imagine then it's also empowering for you to teach other people that like most often women probably, that are doing Pilates and having watching them change their bodies and grow for their better and stronger.

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Speaker 2
Yeah. There's actually one lady. So it's actually a lot of like older ladies in the classes. but there is one lady that like from the start, when I first started teaching her, she couldn't do like a full roll up, which is like, kind of like from laying down, you're rolling all the way up to, seated. And she would have to use momentum, like to get herself up.

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Speaker 2
And then after a couple weeks, I saw that she was like, actually doing the movement. And it was like, crazy, cause I'm like, that's that's the whole point of it, and I love that. So I told her I was like, you, you've gotten so much stronger. She's like, I.

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Speaker 1
Know I can feel it. And I was like, this is awesome.

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Speaker 2
So yeah, it is very empowering to see it.

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Speaker 1
why I, I love weightlifting because I just love watching women get stronger and stronger. And whenever I see, a very, very strong woman at the gym, I'm like, oh my God.

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Speaker 2
That actually was going to. I saw a girl. She was doing like, this weird, like, like chest y stuff. And her arms were like, ripped. And I want to go up to her like, dude, like, you're awesome. You're my hero. I'm like, she was just so, like, fit. And I was like, you can tell she was so strong.

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Speaker 2
So like, it is very like to see that I'm like, yes, go, go do it.

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Speaker 1
I love it. I love like their whole journey. I think it's been so fascinating. You've been on like from one extreme to another from vegan. And like now we're

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Speaker 1
whole ladies. Yeah.

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Speaker 2
I never thought, like, my life would be like that. I honestly thought I would never be, like, a healthy, fit person. And then. Yeah, honest. And then plot does happen.

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Speaker 1
You know what I mean? Either like, I don't know if you remember, but you were pretty fast in grade school. You were like a really fast runner.

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Speaker 2
Yeah.

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Speaker 1
I was not. I was so slow. which is funny now because, like, I'm a pretty decent, okay speed runner. but I that I thought I was just doomed to like life on the couch or something. I never imagined myself being. I mean, I still don't see myself as an athletic person, so it's just it's funny that how the mind works,

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Speaker 2
I think it's a lot of how we grew up, too, because I don't want to, like stereotype either. But like, at least in my family, like we were, it's not a health thing. Like people don't. We don't work out. We don't like think about that stuff. And so I just thought I was never it's not for me. I was never meant to do any of that stuff, but I think I have it in me.

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Speaker 2
So once I started doing all the stuff, I'm like, I'm actually very capable of this. So yeah, I think it's just a lot of mindset trying to get yourself out of that thinking.

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Speaker 1
I think everybody has it in them, right? Yeah. Like because like I was so, so dramatically slow and unfit and I'm like, I'm doing okay. No.

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Speaker 2
Yeah. You are. You're doing.

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Speaker 1
Marathons now.

00:14:56:11 - 00:14:57:15
Speaker 2
half marathon.

00:14:57:18 - 00:15:11:14
Speaker 1
But yeah. So, yeah. So I just wanted to have this conversation with you because I know you've been, like, through the full spectrum and now are you like, do you feel like you're in a healthy, relationship with food and exercise now?

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Speaker 2
This is like, the my 30s is, like, the best years of my life. Like, this is you have more understanding of how your body works, of, like, what you want. And then, just like understanding your body in the way that you eat to like, I don't know, I just I feel like so good in this chapter of my life right now and I, I just want to keep it going.

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Speaker 2
Like that's my biggest fear too, which maybe might not be a good thing because, like, I'm basing out of fear, but I like I'm always scared that it's going to like, disappear or like stop. So that's why I'm like always like going and going and trying to, like do the next thing. So just keep that momentum going. So I don't know if that's actually a healthy way to think of it, but.

00:15:52:17 - 00:16:15:16
Speaker 1
I think it's okay. David Goggins has the same mindset where he is constantly working out because he's like running away from his former self, which was, overweight and lazy. but I think there's like merit to it. Obviously, you also know how to approach from it, from the other angle of love and like you're respecting yourself and you're listening to your body.

00:16:15:16 - 00:16:28:05
Speaker 1
So I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing. Yeah. Motivation is motivation to help you get in the gym. And like whatever I think gets us going is a good thing. Yeah, yeah. Do you want to talk about where we are.

00:16:28:05 - 00:16:45:15
Speaker 2
We're at my store. We're at Wolf and Rebel. So this is the matcha bar behind us. So we added this, about like a year ago now, and it's been going really good. We had a tattoo artists. We have sushi upstairs. It's just like a whole, like, girl power shop. Like best friends always come in here and hang out and, like, it's just.

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Speaker 2
I love the vibe in here.

00:16:47:02 - 00:16:54:14
Speaker 1
It's so cute in here. You've always had for it. To me, you've always had, like, great style and vibes. And I've always been so jealous.

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Speaker 1
What? I didn't know about

00:16:56:01 - 00:17:02:08
Speaker 1
I think so. Remember, like we used to have Asian Avenue and then you would do your pages and I'm like, she's so good.

00:17:02:08 - 00:17:04:00
Speaker 1
Oh my God, I remember that.

00:17:04:00 - 00:17:05:15
Speaker 2
Yeah, I'm LiveJournal and stuff too.

00:17:05:15 - 00:17:06:19
Speaker 1
Yeah. Okay. You've

00:17:06:19 - 00:17:12:19
Speaker 1
always been super creative and I've always like admired that in you. Yeah. Thank you so much. Here. Welcome.

00:17:12:19 - 00:17:17:12
Speaker 1
Okay. Well thank you so much for joining me. I think this has been a really awesome talk.

00:17:17:12 - 00:17:18:19
Speaker 1
where can people find you?

00:17:19:08 - 00:17:23:06
Speaker 2
you can follow me at at. Hey, it's Andy dot Pilates.

00:17:23:06 - 00:17:26:23
Speaker 2
also book through like, the link in my bio for all my classes and stuff too.

00:17:26:23 - 00:17:28:13
Speaker 1
your store is,

00:17:28:13 - 00:17:29:13
Speaker 2
At Shop Wolf and Rebel.

00:17:29:17 - 00:17:34:18
Speaker 1
the matcha bar is where you're serving matcha. Yeah. And there's new flavors coming

00:17:34:18 - 00:17:42:08
Speaker 1
Yeah, all the time. We do like seasonal flavors. We do random specials and stuff. So it's just matcha, but it's, like, really fun. And, like, cool drinks.

00:17:42:08 - 00:17:52:04
Speaker 1
definitely give any a follow on Instagram. You can see what I'm talking about when you go to her Instagram page is very esthetic. And yeah, thanks again for joining me.

00:17:52:04 - 00:17:53:21
Speaker 1
you so much. This is what

00:17:53:21 - 00:17:55:00
Speaker 1
It was fun.

00:17:55:00 - 00:17:56:13
Speaker 1
Hey,